Field Post #3Posted: January 22, 2016
WARNING! WARNING! Yet another far too negative post coming up.
The last week has been fairly mild in terms of enjoyability and drama (I know I spend a lot of my time on this blog complaining about the extremes of my mood swings and my sensitive reactions to the smallest of variations in my day, but for now I will be slightly less dramatic).
I have already failed to keep up to date with these posts and I think that’s mainly down to my lack of motivation for this topic. I know, I know, I shouldn’t complain, and the knowledge that there are always going to be jobs in “the real world” I am not going to enjoy doing but will have to do for my reputation, income etc.
And now it is too late to keep jumping from group to group anyway. So I’m learning to deal with it.
I think my main problem is the fact that (at the risk of coming across as a small school child) I do not ‘fit in’. I feel as though I share nothing with these people, and I don’t mean in a way that I am ‘above them’, I just mean I travel in different circles. University is just one part of this phase of my life; I am also holding down two jobs as well as a voluntary position at Women’s Aid, about twelve groups of friends, attempting to hold together a photography ‘venture’ and at the same time juggle the responsibilities of university.
I feel a bit like the other people here have a lot more time and money to focus wholey on the work the Field brief requires from us. It is evident in the amount of research the other students have done and the physical structures and outcomes that have already been made. And if it wasn’t for this I think I would really enjoy working on this brief.
And I know it’s petty but it’s kind of difficult to keep up moral when everyone else comes in looking like they spent all the time I was at work doing their makeup, straightening their hair, picking out a perfect outfit etc etc and I waddle in all windswept, no makeup on, in my stupidly oversized Metro jacket, looking like a right muppet.
But enough with the sad judgemental moaning, I have got up, admittedly bailed on work but I went to the gym and I am now sitting in a coffee shop in the city, drinking a chocolate covered cappuccino and writing this post while riding a bit of a caffeine induced buzz. With the exception of dodging my boss and that feeling that comes with looking over your shoulder knowing you’re in the wrong, this is how I would like to be living my life right now.
I have an extremely rare day off (minus the hour of work I did on the dark streets of Cardiff this morning), and I intend to fill it with as much productive work I can, between going to uni for an hour for a dreaded talk on my dissertation (groan) and an encounter with the big bad estate agents to sort out the mess that is my house for next year.
One of those very important productive things will be abandoning my very disfunctional group and their half thought out idea and work on what I would do to respond to this Field brief, which will include hugging trees and attaching ribbons to things.
The life of an art student is a fun place to be sometimes.
Watch this space.